Video Friday: The International Tragedy of Forced Adoption

It’s adoption video Friday. This week’s selections are personal stories of forced adoptions in Australia, Canada and the UK.

As many of you know, Australia apologized for the common practice of forced adoption last year.  However, Australia’s government was not the only country involved in the criminal practice of stealing children.  As Dan Rather reported in the 2012 report Adopted or Abducted, the practice of forced adoption was an international epidemic from roughly the 1950’s to 2000.

These stories are tough to watch, but every victim deserves to be heard.

Australia

Canada

UK

Let us never forget or repeat the shameful, painful and criminal act of coerced adoption.  The cost to humankind is beyond words.

Blessings and justice for all mothers and children,
Vicki-lynn

Huffington Post: Good News from Adam Pertman on Adoption Rights

Hooray for the Huffington Post article titled, ‘Equal Rights for All: It’s Finally Time for Adopted People, Too’ by Adam Pertman! Adam is Executive Director of the Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute; and author of ‘Adoption Nation‘ and ‘Adoption by Lesbians and Gay Men‘.

Pertman writes about recent debates over marriage rights for homosexual Americans, and how the fight for equality is much akin to the often ignored rights of adoptees.  Adoptees in nearly every American state are fighting the good fight for equal access to their original birth certificates. Pertman shares good news on this front,  telling us that, “Change is in the air…, and a grassroots adoption-reform movement — akin to the one that led to the marriage-equality cases now before the U.S. Supreme Court — is growing.”

Pertman also takes on the common (and mistaken) belief that open records will result in untold calamities for everyone in the adoption triad. To prove his point, Pertman links to three readily available reports on sealed adoptions and the real-life outcomes of open records legislation.

Pertman writes, “All this information, and far more, is contained in two comprehensive, research-based reports published by the Adoption Institute, “For the Records” and “For the Records II.” Additional information is contained in testimony that I have provided on behalf of the Institute in various states that have considered OBC legislation in recent years, for example in Maryland.”

Equal rights means everyone!  Please don’t miss the article. It is a well-documented look at the issues that define the plight of adult adoptees in America. Bravo Adam, well-done!

Blessing for equal access to your OBC,
Vicki-lynn

Steve Harvey Show – Mara Parker finds Father through AncestryDNA

Happy Reunion Video Friday!

Today’s video is the story of Mara Parker, an adoptee who found her birth father with the help of AncestryDNA.  This video from the Steve Harvey Show explains how Mara used Ancestry.com and DNA testing to locate her birth father.

To learn more about DNA testing, read my post Adoptees Use DNA Testing to Find Relatives.

Blessings for knowing your ancestry,

Vicki-lynn

OHIO Equal Access Call To Action: Adoptees/Birthparents Please Attend Bill HB 61 Hearing March 13, 2013

The HB 61 Adoption Bill will be discussed on March 13, 2013, and the group ROAR  (Restore Ohio Adoptee Rights) 2013 needs your help!

Currently, only adoptees born prior to 1964 and after 1996 have access to their birth records.  The bill would allow access for those born in the missing years.

Below is the update and call to action from the ROAR 2013 site.

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Update #9 POSSIBLE COMMITTEE VOTE ON HB 61! WE NEED YOU AT THE NEXT HEARING!

IN THIS UPDATE

POSSIBLE COMMITTEE VOTE ON HB 61! WE NEED YOU AT THE NEXT HEARING!

The next House Judiciary Committee hearing for HB 61 is now scheduled for Wednesday, March 13th at 3pm. A summary of the last hearing is available below. There is a strong possibility that the committee may vote on the bill on March 13th, so it is IMPERATIVE that all proponents attend this hearing- especially adoptees and birthparents! Because there are several other bills being discussed at this hearing, we have been asked by the committee to limit proponent testimony to 4-5 people for March 13th.

Four adult adoptees delivered fantastic testimony on 3/6, but the committee has yet to hear from birthparents. Currently, the action plan is for Betsie Norris of Adoption Network Cleveland, Kate Livingston of Ohio Birthparent Group and three birthparents (each having placed a child in a different decade of Ohio’s closed adoption record period) to testify on 3/13. We hope to have ALL birthparents in attendance stand behind the podium in solidarity with those three birthparents who will be testifying.

 

ACTION ALERT: THINGS YOU CAN DO

  1. Submit Your Written Testimony: Anyone can submit written testimony regardless of whether or not they deliver oral testimony at a hearing. This may be your last chance to submit your written testimony for HB 61. Please email your written testimony by noon on Tuesday, March 12th to:  Jeff.Dillon@ohiohouse.gov
  2. Attend the March 13th Hearing! We need as many people as possible to be at this hearing. The committee could vote on the bill during this hearing, so it is critical that we have as many proponents as possible in the room. If there was ever a date to be there – this is it.
  3. Birthparents Stand Together- Attend the hearing and stand in solidarity at the podium with the three birthparents who will be testifying.
  4. Continue to let your legislator know that you want them to support these bills. To find your legislator, go to: http://www.legislature.state.oh.us

To learn more about ROAR and HB 61, visit their site.

Blessings for Equal Access in Ohio!
Vicki-lynn

Breaking News from ABC: Twice Adopted, Abandoned Daughter to Get Millions

Breaking News

Breaking News

In a story filled with sad turns of fate, and rejection, ABC News reports that adoptee Emily Fuqui Svenningsen will inherit millions from the family who adopted, then rejected her.

This ruling re-enforces an adoptee’s rights to a stable, consistent home. It also reminds prospective adoptive parents that we are NON TRANSFERABLE.

Svenningsen with biological children
Facebook/GA Daily News

 

 

 

 

 

 

Note that Svenningsen did not relinquish any ‘biological’ kids once tragedy struck.

Here is the ABC News report:

Widow Owes Rejected Adopted Daughter Millions, Court Rules

Blessings for  justice,

Vicki-lynn

OK! Magazine: Green Day bassist mourns the loss of his birth mother

It is tragic that Green Day bassist Mike Dirnt did not find his birth mother sooner. He found her in December, discovering that they were long-time neighbors. She died on January 13, 2013, just one month after Dirnt found her.

Have to wonder if him finding her, gave her the peace to move on.

You can read more about his mourning here.

OK! Magazine: First For Celebrity News :: Latest Celebrity News :: Green Day bassist mourns the loss of his birth mother.

  • Curious, have any readers found their birthfamilies after the death of their biological parent?
  • Do you have a relationship with the extended family?
  • Are you still happy that you searched?

Share your thoughts using the ‘comment’ link below.

Blessings for a living reunion of depth and meaning,Vicki-lynn

Moscow to Manhattan: Russian Adoption Ban puts Focus on American Abuse

Happy New Year!

I have been mulling over the Russian adoption news announced in late December, and after two weeks of contemplation, here’s my take on the situation. As most of you have heard by now, Russian President Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin has banned the adoption of Russian children to US residents.

President Vladimir Putin

President Vladimir Putin

The Wall Street Journal reports that the adoption ban was “pushed through parliament to retaliate for a new U.S. law aimed at punishing alleged Russian human-rights violators.” Reportedly, Putin also considered recent cases of American’s returning adopted children when they could not cope, and the killing of 19 Russia adoptees in American homes.

In February, I blogged on the news that a  Tennessee woman put her Russian born adopted 7-year-old on a plane back to Russia, due to his violent behavior, and the death of Nathanial Craver,  a 7-year old Russian adoptee killed by his adoptive parents.  In that post, I suggested that all countries require etxtensive psychological testing for prospective adoptive parents.

While I feel horrible for the fifty or so families who were in the process of adopting from Russia, when Putin pulled the rug on the adoption process, I feel worse for the 19 murdered Russian children who were sent to live in our great country, where parents are purported to be superior and the opportunities abundant. Those orphans left Russia with the same heart hope that every abandoned child carries, and landed in the killing fields of poorly monitored US adoptive homes.

Child abuse is rampant in America. Monitoring and background checks of prospective adoptive families are lax, and even long term monitoring would not expose all the demon parents out there. However, more needs to be done.

Just because you happen to be American, and want a kid does not automatically entitle you to adopt one. Adoptive parents should be held to high standards, because they are raising a child already damaged by abandonment.  I think Putin saw a political opportunity, and used it to his advantage, but it was America’s plague of abuse, and lack of child justice that made it easy for him to do so.

Some statistics from the National children’s Alliance:

  • Nearly five children die every day in America from abuse and neglect.
  • In 2010, an estimated 1,560 children died from abuse and neglect in the United States.
  • In the same year, Children’s Advocacy Centers around the country served over 266,000 child victims of abuse, providing victim advocacy and support to these children and their families. In 2011, this number was over 279,000.

Blessings for a safe, just and honorable new year,
Vicki-lynn
UPDATE 1/11/13: Washinton Post reports that Putin’s ban on American adoption will not go into effect for one year. This could mean that adoptions already approved by Russian courts will be completed. It would be interesting to follow the adoptions that do go through to see how many are healthy and successful for the children.

Holiday Wonder: Not so Wonderful for Adoptees in Search

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to each of you. This can be the hardest time of year for adoptees and birth parents in search. The holidays bring  families together and thus the missing member looms ever larger and heavier on wondering hearts.

Amstramgram/Flickr.com

Amstramgram/Flickr.com

My Christmas experience  this year was blessed with knowing where all of my family members are, what they look like, and how they fit into the wonderful, whacky identity that is me. However,  I recall with fervent clarity, the pain and aching wonder of not knowing who I was for 27 years.

Being born on Christmas Eve, meant that every Christmas brought forth images of what it must have been like for my birth mother to be in labor before the holiday, knowing that I would not be going home with her. I now know that it ruined Christmas for her from that day forward. My half-brother and sister, always wondered why she was so sad at Christmas, and only when I found her in 1992 did they finally understand.

If you are Christian, this season is all about the miracle birth of Jesus, and so your own miraculous entry into the world comes to mind. For more than two decades, I  wondered if anyone smiled when I was born. I wondered if my birth mother thought of me on my birthday. I wondered if the nurses at the hospital put me in a stocking because I was a Christmas baby (as I’d seen depicted on TV).

My holiday gift to you, is to simply tell you that – I get it. I acknowledge the hidden pain of not knowing. You are perfectly normal to wonder about the missing puzzle piece. Whether signed away or stolen, you have a right to feel empty, and cheated, especially during this family focused season. I am sorry for your loss, and hope with all my heart that 2013 will be a year of glorious reunion for you.

Miracles do happen, and so I will end with a story of holiday hope and adoption reunion from Ireland.

Family’s dream Christmas reunion becomes a reality | Irish Examiner.

Blessings for a peaceful heart and the calm that knowing brings,
Vicki-lynn